Birthday with Jiraiya
by M. Sarah C
Summary: Jiraiya is eager to celebrate Naruto’s birthday. But as everything starts to go wrong, he wonders if he should’ve opened that can of worms. (one shot) WARNING: FLUFF AND SLIGHT HEADCANNON.


Jiraiya walked around the marketplace, unsure of where to actually start. He was inclined to get him some ramen coupons, but that didn't really seem appropriate. It was quite busy, people shoving into each other, trying to get a good deal. It had been about seven months since he decided to train his godson full time. They had made some real progress but he was still a haughty, little punk.

He hated to admit it, but he really liked the kid. He was a real tenacious fellow, never giving up on becoming Hokage. Or even giving up on his friend... It reminded him of training Minato, but well, he was definitely the better student. Still, Naruto had a kind of energy and charisma that seemed to go unchallenged. He almost always had a smile on her face.

Recently, Jiraiya had been abstaining from saki, just so he could keep on his toes better. The Akatsuki were an ever looming threat.

He hated leaving the kid alone ever since that one time when he'd been careless. He didn't show it but it had really scared him. If he hadn't been there-

Jiraiya didn't want to think about what would have happened. He shook his head, trying to dispel the ever accumulating paranoia. Jiraiya passed a couple of posters for his new, upcoming book, He had long gotten over the shock of seeing his work everywhere, and long since ignored the constant lampooning that came with every release. He'd always seen one new article talking about how his books were 'unclean'. Which was true. But if you didn't want to read erotica, then why did you pick up the book?

Something in one of the stores caught his attention. It was a Omamori, black and gold glittering in the market lights. It was for success… Perfect. Jiraiya was able to acquiesce it from the seller. He spent a little more than he would have liked. But what can you do?

Jiraiya walked back to the hotel, a plan slowly forming in his head. Naruto was probably still training and would be training for quite a while.

He had a habit of working himself to the bone then complaining about having to get up early in the morning. Kids.

Jiraiya walked to the kitchen. He had some experience with whipping up something decent. Raising three kids had taught him a little about how to manage a house. The cookbook had stained a little and it was a little hard to read.

Jiraiya was thinking about white sponge cake and some ramen. It seemed good enough. The proud part of him wanted to make the ramen from scratch. But he didn't want to burn the kitchen down. He might be able to cook, but that doesn't make him a chef. Jiriaya pulled a bowl out and got out some of the ingredients. He pulls out some eggs and cracked them into the pot. He put in the flour and mixed the bowl. He may have added a tad too much flour in, considering how it was turning out, but you can't go back now. He put the dough into a pan and put it in the stove.

He looked at the cookbook again, just to make sure he had everything before he continued. Jiraiya set the pot to a boil and threw some ramen packets in. He added a little bit of black pepper for a kick. It took an hour, which wasn't surprising. The cake didn't look too bad and the ramen was fine. Did it really matter how it looked?

He covered the cake with an empty pot so it wouldn't get ruined. Jiraiya set the table, keeping the Omamori in the kitchen. It'd be a nice surprise. Jiraiya locked the door and went outside. The sun had not yet set so it was still pretty early. He walked past other attendants, most of which were either newlyweds or older gentlemen. Jiraiaya was very much tempted to stop by the hot spring.

But he resisted. He wasn't gonna get swept up in that tonight. He was gonna spend some good quality time with his godson, even if it killed him.

Jiraiya walked past the hotspring and into the rims of the forest. He saw a small figure dressed in orange and blue. He seemed to be doing weightlifting while on the sides of trees. Showing off. Typical.

"Hey pipsqueak!" Jiriaya called. Naruto immediately lost balance and slammed down hard onto the ground. Crap.

Jiraiya raced towards Naruto's sprawled out body. He'd landed on his back, thankfully. He shook himself up.

"Hey, are you okay kid?" Jiraiya asked. Naruto still looked like the wind had been knocked out of him.

"Heh. I'm fine! But it's your fault I fell!"

"You're the one who lost balance!"

"Well, you're the one was yelling so loud!"

Jiraiya dusted his back off. If he was fine enough to argue then he'd be good.

"You ready to head back?"

"Already?" Naruto whined. He obviously wanted to get back to his exercises.

"Yes, already. I'm tired and I want to have dinner before I pass out!"

They played off each other until they got to their place. Naruto quickly burst through the door and headed straight for the bathroom. Jiraiya felt a weird sort of nostalgia.

When Naruto came out, Jiraiya was already waiting at the table.

"Woah! You cooked? Is tonight special or somethin'?"

He really was an idiot.

"Oh come on! I cook sometimes!"

"Yeah, well, you never cook ramen."

"Just sit down and eat!"

Naruto sat down and blessed the food. He eagerly grabbed some chopsticks and dug in. He smiled wide and shoved it down his throat.

"Hey, I have a surprise for you." Jiraiya went into the kitchen to grab the omamori. He heard some coughing.

"Something go down the wrong hole?"

No response.

Jiraiya looked back and saw Naruto wheezing. He was gagging for air. Jairaya raced over to him. He tried performing the heimlich maneuver but it didn't seem to work. His mind panicked and he couldn't think. What was wrong?!

Jiraiya tapped his foot, the only thing he can think to do. It felt like it had been years, but in reality, it probably only had thirty minutes. But it was agonizing. The clock ticked so slowly, he was sure a slug could beat it in a race if the slug was covered in molasses.

The hospital waiting room was nice enough. The lights flickered occasionally, but only occasionally. There were some others there, but not that many. It was a small town after all. The waiting room had flowers and 'Get Well Soon!" signs that seemed to mock him. It all felt too happy and sunshine, especially since he was waiting for the ER.

His mind was still racing, screaming at itself. He didn't know anything! He was an idiot. What a way to start a birthday party? Jiraiya bit his lip again, only to realize it was bleeding. Jiraiya squeezed his fist into a ball and let out of it. It was somewhat comforting, so kept doing it.

Finally, the doctor emerged alone. 'Great, I killed him' Jiraiya thought. The doctor didn't look very serious, which was good. He almost looked half amused. He walked over to where Jiraiya had been sitting and said "He should be fine. From the looks of it, he had an allergic reaction. Did he eat or touch anything new?"

Jiraiya's heart stopped.

Black pepper.

"I almost killed him!!" Jiraiya screamed. The doctor caught him quickly, "Hey, hey. Don't be having a heart attack in the waiting room! He's fine. We need to do a couple more routine checks, then he's good to go. He's breathing has gone down and he's doing okay. He's a pretty tough cookie, so don't sweat it. It's okay, you're not a bad parent."

Parent??

"Thank you," Jiraiya mumbled, plopping back down unto the chair. His mind slowly calmed down and he began to organize his thoughts. Naruto's okay. he didn't murder his godson. He was fine. Jiriaya made a mental note to NEVER use to black pepper. One heck of a kick.

A nurse leads Naruto into the waiting room with his vest tied around his waist and a couple of bandaids on his arm. His necklace dangles as he races over calling at maximum volume, "HEY PERVY SAGE!!"

Jiraiya's face blushes so hard. Naruto stops halfway and asks, "Hey, are you okay?"

He suddenly realized he was crying and quickly brushed away the tears.

"I'm fine."

"Heyy, were you crying?"

"Oh shut up."

The nurse giggles and says, "You seem much better!"

"Yeah, thanks. Whatever you did!"

"It's a pleasure. How about I show you two out?"

"We're fine. Thank you Ma'am, "Jiraiya said and started to walk. Naruto picked up pace and caught up with him. The doofus was smiling. Apparently, Jiraiya was the only one who freaked out.

Naruto seemed unfazed and probably didn't know what just happened.

"You're allergic to black pepper."

"Got it."

They walked for a bit.

"Hey, pervy sage… Was that the surprise?"

The omamori. He'd completely forgotten. He checked his jacket, fumbling through his pockets.

He dropped it.

"NO! It's gone…"

Naruto grin fell slightly, "Is it important? Want me to help you look for it?"

They searched the marketplace. It was just as busy as before, maybe even more so. People shoved and pushed. Loose items cluttered the gutter. Jiraiya search frantically for the omamori. Naruto looked around too. Though, he probably had no idea what was searching for

An hour had passed before Jiraiya finally gave up. He dropped down onto the sidewalk. Naruto came up for a popsicle and sat down next to him.

"I thought you were saving that money up for another stack of ramen cups?" Jiraiya asked.

Naruto shrugged and broke him off a piece. They sat there, eating the already melting popsicle.

Jiraiya and Naruto got back to the apartment when it was pretty dark. Jiraiya went into the kitchen and looked under the pot. The cake seemed to be the only thing untouched by tonight's bad luck.

"Hey Naruto, sit at the table, will ya?" Jiraiya was already pretty tired but he wanted to at least, get the cake right. Jiraiya glanced over the wall. Naruto, despite going to the hospital and being dragged on a search quest, was still smiling. Maybe he could salvage this night after all. Jiriaya grabbed the cake and placed it on the table.

Naruto smile fell. He stared at the cake. His face was a mix of confusion, and oddly, guilt.

"Hey uh, Pervy Sage? I'm gonna get some lifting in before bed. Be back before midnight."

Naruto got up and quickly left the room. Jiraiya was hurt, at first. Anger pricked at his mind. He had been trying so hard all night to make it special and he just up and left.

But, the prominent feeling was guilt and concern. Jiraiya abandoned the cake and went outside.

He found Naruto, in the dark forest. He wasn't training, just sitting. Jiraiya went down and sat by him.

"Sorry. The cake looks nice," Naruto mumbled.

"Thanks. But I added too much flour… Do you know what day it is?"

"I'm not that dumb. I figured out a while ago."

Jiraiya bit his lip. His wasn't really sure what to say next. He know he upset him. With the cake and all. But he wasn't exactly sure how.

"The cake… that was a poor decision, wasn't it?"

"Nah, I'm just a dummy."

They both sat there, the night growing slightly more dark as the minutes passed.

"People don't like to see me today. So I usually just stay inside."

Jiraiya winced. Of course, he was an idiot. This was the day of the nine tails attack. Of course there was gonna be complications. Of course he wouldn't want to celebrate. No else had ever wanted to.

Naruto leaned against Jiraiya and whispered, "But I gotta admit that this was the craziest birthday I've ever had."

They sat there together, the endless sky turning above them.


End file.
